The fact that she feels like shit makes her angry, which makes her feel even more like shit, and she knows this isn't how the night was supposed to go. It's not like she's even doing anything but talking -- maybe she was flirting a little -- but she still knows how it looks. And even though she's here with Steve and has no plans on fucking that up, she's suddenly very aware of what she's done with Rowan before tonight.
She hasn't shagged him, but they've made out. Not recently, but enough that she feels guilty and that makes her mad, too. This is why she's so bad at stuff like this and why good guys like Jackson and Steve and Rowan should all just leave her the hell alone. It all just freaks her out because it's inevitable she'll fuck it up and then, if Jackson is anything to go by, one more person who used to be her friend will hate her.
She says goodbye and then, rather than going straight to find Steve, Maeve finds a bathroom and locks herself inside to smoke a cigarette with the window cracked open. Her hands are shaking and she's pissed off about that, too, but by the time she finishes her smoke, she's feeling a bit better. She washes her hands, stares at herself in the mirror for a moment, trying to work out why Steve even wants anything to do with her, then heads back out to find him.
He's by the bar, which makes her nervous. The last time she'd gone on a date anything like this had been to the school dance with Jackson. He'd gotten drunk and been a prick all night.
"Hey," she says, coming up and touching his elbow.
no subject
The fact that she feels like shit makes her angry, which makes her feel even more like shit, and she knows this isn't how the night was supposed to go. It's not like she's even doing anything but talking -- maybe she was flirting a little -- but she still knows how it looks. And even though she's here with Steve and has no plans on fucking that up, she's suddenly very aware of what she's done with Rowan before tonight.
She hasn't shagged him, but they've made out. Not recently, but enough that she feels guilty and that makes her mad, too. This is why she's so bad at stuff like this and why good guys like Jackson and Steve and Rowan should all just leave her the hell alone. It all just freaks her out because it's inevitable she'll fuck it up and then, if Jackson is anything to go by, one more person who used to be her friend will hate her.
She says goodbye and then, rather than going straight to find Steve, Maeve finds a bathroom and locks herself inside to smoke a cigarette with the window cracked open. Her hands are shaking and she's pissed off about that, too, but by the time she finishes her smoke, she's feeling a bit better. She washes her hands, stares at herself in the mirror for a moment, trying to work out why Steve even wants anything to do with her, then heads back out to find him.
He's by the bar, which makes her nervous. The last time she'd gone on a date anything like this had been to the school dance with Jackson. He'd gotten drunk and been a prick all night.
"Hey," she says, coming up and touching his elbow.